My Top 10 Parenting Fails!

Let’s be honest, no parent is perfect.We all make mistakes,balls things up regularly and I’m sure most of us have thoughts such as “what the hell am I meant to do now?” when faced with a new baby to look after alone! So here are some of the things I’ve naffed up so far – and these are just the ones I haven’t hidden in the ‘too embarrassed to remember’ memory banks!

1.The time I forgot to pack sick bags for my child who got terrible car sickness and as I had a brand spanking new courtesy car at the time I didn’t want him vomming all over it I had to give him my freshly bought day old handbag. Couldn’t face washing it out and had to bin it!

2.The time I left it 2 seconds longer than I should have to find out why my daughter was quiet only to find her in the bathroom covering herself in tooth paste. Mmmm Minty fresh!

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3.The time the hubby and I were  brave whilst we were potty training and took our daughter to his Mum’s without a clean pull-up.Cue wet patch on her settee and cream carpet. Awkward.

4.The time I thought “what harm could it do?” if I let my little man eat Coco Pops on the living room floor.What could possibly go wrong. Right?

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5.The time I didn’t check that we did, in fact, still have spare clothes in the boot of the car and let the kids play in the stream. Cue poor little 6 year old boy crying on the way home as the makeshift cover-up hoody “looked like a skirt”.

6.The time,whilst baking with the kids, I said “don’t touch anything” while I went to get something. Came back to find my kitchen like a scene from Frozen. No pics sadly,was too traumatized.

7.The time my Mum was watching Countdown and every time the Countdown clock got to the end my 3 year old shouted “Effing hell” to this day I have NO idea where on earth he got it from as I never watch it! Fair to say she was horrified – although I’m sure I saw a sneaky smirk as she turned away.

8.The time I forgot to give my son his dinner money, on ringing the secretary to apologise and ask if they could provide him with a lunch and I would pay later I was met with a stony silence – I’m sure she was pressing the speed dial for Social Services. Surely I can’t have been the first – or last?!

9.The time my 2 year old daughter did a runner in Asda only to be picked up giggling and brought back by the Security Guard, in the meantime her Father and I had 3 heart attacks each and lost at least 10 years off our lives!

10.The time I got on the bus and this pic was scrawled on the seat in front.I’m ashamed to say I absolutely wet myself and the kids thought I’d completely lost the plot and wanted to know why I was laughing. Obvs I said it was because there was a silly man making faces outside!

 

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First featured on:

Rookie Mistakes

4 thoughts on “My Top 10 Parenting Fails!

  1. Those are hilarious! We’re right there with ya too… Can’t think of the times gone out and didn’t have the change of clothes we should have! Or, literally on the parking lot of the hospital, while holding one child, the other threw something and busted the other’s lip open into a bloody mess! I should post a 10 of our own in response! Thanks for the inspiration. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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